I know I can't do anything to change the past as much as I have no recollection on what lays upon the future. But I know one thing for sure, I have a heart, big enough to know where to stand and when I have to synchronize what I feel inside my heart with what I have in mind, and surrender to the fact that the only thing to do is sit in silence, and believe that God will complete what I have started with dignity and one day, He will deliver me to His Glory.
Who would imagine what will happen tomorrow, we aren't wise enough to say to ourselves that we are dare to face all, both happiness and sadness. The moment u know that your heart is willing to try, just make sure that u actually ready for all possibilities, including the possibility to make the hardest decision or the possibility to get hurt. We all got hurt n cried once a while, but maybe today is the day to get rid of those negative thoughts n start your day with a winner mind set, for you were created by our the Greatest Creator. And I always believe that I’m precious enough to be loved by Him and by that reason; I knew it very well that he will never put me on a platform of humiliation by believing that I will always find my happiness at the end of every rainbow after terrible storms.
Everything happens for a reason, and I have the honour to look at the east side of the sky, wait for the sunrise, praise the Lord and make my simple wish for my babies, my family, my dearest friends, my students, my colleagues and some strangers that captured my attention. I have learned to communicate with my heart and the Lord by many simple unexpected things; I guess I’m blessed with the ability to see things differently in life, and sometimes, I have these amazing moments of finding courage to do something that I fear the most.
But, does everything really worth a try? What is the most important thing that you have to calculate the moment you’re willing to open your heart to options and new possibilities? Or, should you stay inside your secure zone and let things passed you by no matter what it is? We all didn’t come to the planet with the ability to run or do the things that we can do now. We were born as vulnerable beings, nothing much that we could do, we even had no ability to survive like other creatures at their earliest time of life. But, by God’s abundant love, we were surrounded by the people that cherished us so dearly, God also blessed us with the experience of falling down and hurt our knees the moment we were learning how to walk on our own feet.
I have learned that instead of having this Heavenly Wisdom, our God is also a very unique and humorous individual; He loves to make jokes just like us. In some points of my life, I think He’s having His own amusement by letting me twist my mind around and try to figure out what would I do and what decisions should I take. But then again, He’s a generous and kind God that never freeze our feet when He didn’t want us to walk to the path that He didn’t approve. He didn’t shut our lips when He didn’t want us to say things that didn’t please Him. He didn’t tell us when, where, who or why to obstacles that lays on our journye or; He also didn’t show us which way to lay our eyes when we really need to see this and that. He blessed us with this ‘Free will” to choose and use the heart, mind and soul that He had given to us as instruments to see things the way He does.
Yes, we all blessed with that abilities, we just didn’t realize it! We were too busy with our sadness; we were too occupied by our grief and sorrow, without acknowledging that God actually had poured the sensitivity to see things clearer and wiser. Sadness is the legacy of the past and regrets are the pain of memory. The only way to get rid of sadness is to throw away this legacy and receive God’s new promise and believe in what you feel deep in your heart. And stop regretting for things, this is the only way to let go the pain and avoid yourself from killing the great and happy memories in you!
Maybe you were sitting in tears, listening to someone saying things that hurt you so much; you might regretting your decision to open your heart to a person that never had the courage to tell you how much he/she needed you to stand right next to him/her; or you might trying to tell your self, ‘What on earth am I doing with this person? He didn’t even have the guts to see himself as a complete person to love me? He kept using the term that he’s not ‘good enough’ to close the door of possibilities that we might meant to each other!” Well, I can give you hundreds of other painful things just to complete the reasons for you to cry, but I also can tell you this, who would imagine if you didn’t do what you had done? Who would imagine how bitter you could be by the cause that you didn’t see the possibility to open your heart ever again? And Who would imagine how dark your life and nights if you didn’t have that painful conversation, the moment that you heard the rejection is the moment that you could learn that you are not a rejected object, and you are beautiful just being YOU!
You are deserved to be loved, cherished and adored for you were born as a lovable baby once, and yes, you are lovable until this very moment. Look at your own reflection in the mirror, and see the beautiful YOU in it, let there be sparkles of diamonds around your face, let there be a joyful sounds of angels the moment you sing the songs of hope, and most of all, let there be love and hope shines through your eyes. And with this moment of grace, let your heart receive the blessing of feeling good about yourself, and let this positive energy shines through out your life, and effect the people in your surroundings with a positive and heavenly way too, for you know how to do things with a great deal of love within YOU.
I wish you to always believe that even though you’re disappointed by human’s decisions and plans, you will always have the courage to see that God has greater, grander plans for you. And the only way to see and understand those plans is through keeping your courage to do things as best as you can as your contribution to love, life and the people around you.
Love to you all, God be with you, always...
Lisa Fransiska Sitompul
March 18th 2010